Wednesday, December 15, 2010

Christmas Spirit...........

has seem to have left me this year.  I can't get into the decorating and enjoying it like I use to.  I don't know if it's just because I am aging, but it really isn't much fun anymore for me.  I'm wondering if it has to do with the spousal unit being a "bah-humbugger" for so many years, or if it's the fact that the grandkids no longer wish to come and help with it all and bake Christmas cookies as we always did in the past.  I guess they are all getting too old and have outgrown that tradition.  Or maybe as we age, we just become boring to them and they would much rather be with their friends! 

But even though I've lost my Christmas spirit, I still want to wish all my friends out in blogville a very Merry Christmas and a Happy and Healthy New Year.

Monday, November 22, 2010

November Tornado Watch.........Really?

Well, with the temp of 59º and no signs of it dropping, we are under a tornado watch until 2AM Tues. morning! This weather is unheard of in Michigan for this late in November. I mean, the hunters are hoping for snow so they can track deer if they shoot grass and mud  aren't always conducive for hunting.

I have been a hunting widow for the last week and it will continue through this week too! I'm getting used to it after 20 years of it. Besides, Tom works third shift and he's not home at night anyway, so there really isn't much change. The dogs don't even seem confused. They're used to having him gone nights and sleep during the day too!

Our Kentucky kids are supposed to come for Thanksgiving this year, but they may not make it. The kids are sick with sinus infections, the youngest one, 13 month old Abby may have pnemonia and both parents have had some kind of stomach virus. The kind where you aren't sure which end to hold over the toilet! Hope they feel better soon. I don't blame them for not wanting to make a nine hour drive with a bunch of sickies in the car. We will have to wait and see how quickly they can recover and feel better.

Amber is coming down tomorrow after school and will get to spend the weekend with me. Sure am looking forward to that. When school starts we never see as much of her as we do in the summertime. Amber lived with us the first five years of her life, so we have a special bond. Not that we love her more than the 20 some other grandkids, it's just a different kind of bond! She is the oldest child of my youngest birth son. My son and her mom never married, but have a good relationship with one another for Amber's sake. My son married for the first time in Sept. and Amber's mom is engaged, so all seems to be working out well.

I wish the rain and thunder and lightning would stop. Prancer doesn't really like all the noise and the flashes and flat out refuses to go outside to go to the bathroom when the weather gets like this. But if this were snow we probably would have an 18 inch accumulation by now. So I guess we better count our blessings and be grateful.

Until next time..........

Thursday, October 07, 2010

Indian Summer

Okay, October is here and today is supposed to be very pleasant.  Perhaps the rest of the week will be like Indian Summer.  I remember Indian Summer as a kid.  It was always so could actually go outside and play without bundling up to stay warm.  Hope this day proves to be one of them. Not that I can play, but I can sit on the deck and read!

Yesterday was my dad's birthday, although he has been gone since 1963.  He was killed by a drunk driver when I was 17 years old.  And although it's been 47 years ago, I can still remember getting the call from the hospital to come as soon as possible and making the trip with my mom!  One of the worst days of my life.............there have been other bad ones too.  Like when my mom passed away 3 years later and my first husband dieing of cancer at the age of 34; losing a grand baby 9 years ago.  Let's hope there aren't anymore days like that for a long while!  Sorry, this seems to have gotten a little maudlin and I didn't mean for it too!

But it is a beautiful day outside, and I think I will wait just a wee bit longer for it to warm up a little's 64º out now and it is supposed to get warmer in a little while, before I head out on the deck to read.  And maybe, just maybe, the box elder bugs won't be so bad today! 

Saturday, October 02, 2010


The wedding was lovely.   The bride and groom are thrilled as are all 6 of the kids they blended into one big family..............sort of like the Brady Bunch.......only I'm sure they will have more trouble than the blended TV family..........LOL!  As you can see, it was an outdoor wedding and although the rain held off until the next day, it was pretty chilly with a temp of only about 57º!  The bridesmaids, as well as the bride, all had sundresses on and while they looked very nice, they also looked very cold.

My oldest daughter is a photographer and she took their wedding pictures as their family gift to the new couple.  She is still editing a lot of them as she works full time outside the home and has a family to take care of too.  But they will get them all (400 of them) on a disk very soon and they can look through them at their leisure and pick the ones they want!

Needless to say, I cried.  This was our last one to get married!  Although they have 6 children between them and they will have to blend it and make it work, I am confident that they can do it.  After all, my son had good teachers.  We did it too, but only with five kids!

I called them the other day to see how things were and they both sounded so much in love that I almost cried again!

So, this is the only update in a while, I will try to remember to get back her more often to read others and to write!

Wednesday, August 04, 2010

Family news..............

I am very excited tonight.  I just found out that my middle son and his fianceè are tentatively planning their wedding for the 24th or 25th of September.  I often wondered if I would live to see this day.  They both have children from previous relationships and will be blending a family.  I know it won't be easy for them, but my son had good teachers as his step-dad and I married and blended our two families into one, and it was successful! Albeit not without some hardships along the way, but we were able to accomplish it and I know they will be successful at it too!  I have notified all of his siblings tonight so they can plan on keeping those days open.  Our youngest son and his wife were married on Sept. 25th a few years ago and I'm hoping they can make it and don't have plans to celebrate their anniversary already.  Our youngest daughter and her family live in Kentucky and may not be able to attend.  We will understand, but I sure wish they could!  That is the most important news of the day.

The other news is I have a doctor appointment with my original cardiologist tomorrow and am hoping that he knows of some other doctor, perhaps in another state or a major university that can preform the procedure I need without telling me that I won't come off the table alive.  I have mixed feelings about this appointment......excited that I may get good news and leery that I may be told the same things that have already been said.  So for those of you out there reading this, who believe in God, I would appreciate any prayers you can find in your heart to offer for me!

It may take me a day or two to let you know what I find out, but I will let you all know eventually!  And God Bless you all!

Monday, July 12, 2010

I am tired...............

tired of not being able to do the things I want to do and the things I need to do.  I didn't realize just how physically exhausted this would make me.  Just trying to function from day to day and keep up with the housework and all.  As soon as the house market picks up here, I believe we will be putting our home up for sale and downsizing to perhaps a 2 bedroom all on one floor.  I know a two-story is not workable for me anymore.  There are times I just want to lie down and sleep and never have to get up again.  Feeling this way is so out of character for me and the way I have always felt in the past.  Now, I feel like I am a bother to everyone and more of a hindrance than a help.  I have always been the one people have turned to when they needed help.............and I just can't do that anymore.  It saddens me to think that this is what it has come down too.  But, I guess it is what it is and there is nothing I or anyone can do about it.  Unless they come up with some new technology to be able to fix the health problems I have.............and I hope and pray that they do!

Friday, June 25, 2010


Well, the CT Scan has been read and I have seen the Vascular Surgeon and there is nothing they can do for me.  Either procedure, major surgery or aortic stenting would be the end of me.  He point blank told me that I would not make it off the table alive.  Kind of shocking news to hear when I had such high hopes that they would be able to fix everything!

After being told several months ago to quit exercising, including walking, I am now told to begin a walking program.  To start slowly and build up to 20-30 minutes per day, 7 days a week.  And I have an appointment with the Vascular Surgeon again in 3 months.  He is hoping by that time, the muscle tone in my legs will have improved enough to prescribe a medication that aids in circulation.  As was explained to me by another cardiologist, the whole purpose is to increase the blood flow to the muscles, even if that means that my body will make newer, smaller blood vessels to take over the ones that no longer work.  And that is what they expect will happen. 

I hope they're right!

Monday, June 21, 2010

CT Scan finished.............

now I am just waiting for Wednesday to hurry up and get here and I can go get the opinion of the Vascular Surgeon.  Went for bloodwork today.  It's beginning to feel as if Dr.'s offices, Labs, and hospitals are my home away from home.

I did ask the cardiologists if by sending me to see a Vascular Surgeon, it means they are thinking more along the lines of major surgery instead of stenting and they told me "yes" that is exactly what it means.  So I am sort of resigned to the fact that I will be having major surgery.  I just wish they would hurry up and tell me when and how extensive it will be!  I, like everyone else, do not like the unknown!  It's a little scary just imagining what they will do and how much it will hurt when I wake up.  Okay, I admit it, I'm a tad bit of a wuss!  Can't help it...............don't like pain and don't handle it well at all.  I try to be brave, but always seem to fail miserably at it. 

I guess it is what it is and I will find out Wednesday what will happen.  Que sera, sera!

Monday, June 07, 2010

Here's the deal!

Had a procedure done Friday.  Not the one I was supposed to have.  My cardiologist didn't like the looks of the pictures from the angiogram back in March and decided that before he could do anything, he needed better pictures.  If they were okay, he would go ahead and place the stent.  They showed something different than his partners picture taking, so the stent still wasn't placed.  I will have to do this at least on more time now.

If he had tried to put the stent in on Friday, it would have immediately shut both my kidneys down and that would have been it!  I am thankful that he had the foresight to take more pictures and do the angiogram first.  The next step will be for them to schedule a CT scan to get precise measurements and then have a stent special made to fit the area without shutting down the kidneys.  

Although the stent wasn't put in place, they still had to invade my body with a catheter and go through the groin to take the pictures for the angiogram.  It feels like I am sore for no good reason even though I realize it was a good reason.  Still, the soreness and pain is not at all pleasant!

That's all for now, until I have further news to share besides, I can't sit here any longer!

Thursday, June 03, 2010

Preparing for yet another procedure!

Today I am preparing for yet one more procedure.  This one is to open up a blockage at the bottom of the aorta just above where it branches off to feed each leg and open the blockage to my right kidney.  Hoping this will do the trick and I will be good.  Although they are talking about blockages in the lower legs that will have to be done at a later date if they aren't able to do them this time.  And the problem being is that I am allergic to the contrast dye they must use and they can't leave it in my system for too long because of the blocked kidney reducing it's function.  Even after opening it up, it make take a few days for the kidney to begin it's normal functioning.

So today, I have begun taking the medicine to protect my kidneys from the contrast dye and the medication to prevent an anaphylactic allergic reaction to the dye.  Right now I am doing all the laundry, and cooking enough supper that we can have after my overnight stay in the hospital.  Just something to help Bumpa out, so all he will have to do is reheat it for us for Saturday's supper.  Sitting at the hospital with me tomorrow and waiting for the outcome and to see how I did and coming home to an empty house except for the dogs, then having to come back to pick me up and bring me home will be stressful enough for him without having to worry about housework, laundry and cooking! 

Tomorrow I may not have anything to eat or drink for 8 hours before the procedure.  That means if I want coffee and breakfast, I will have to get up at 5AM in order to eat, have my much needed coffee and take my medications.  The procedure is at 2PM, but last time an emergency came in and my procedure needed to be set back.  I'm okay with all that; just makes for a hungry woman and that is not a good thing for me (or those who have to be around me)!

If you get a chance and believe in God, please say a prayer or two for me.  Thanks!

Wednesday, May 26, 2010

What a day!

I spent all of yesterday with my husband's Aunt and her brother at a local hospital.

Uncle has had several health problems over the years and the latest being throat cancer.  He has had his voice box and other tissue and muscles in his neck removed.  The last time he was in Ann Arbor, they told him there was nothing more they could do for him. 

My hubby has always been good about helping people.  So when the call came in yesterday at 5AM and he was going out the door to work, there was nothing he could do to help.  I could tell he felt terrible about this because it isn't in his character to not help.  I told him go to work and I will call your Aunt and we will handle whatever needed to be done.  Hubby went to work, I called his Aunt, she picked me up and we both went over to Uncle's apartment.  WOW!  It wasn't anything we were expecting.  I wasn't aware that the beginning of the end would be so messy...............and I won't go into the details here.....they are much to graphic.  And suffice it to say, that I didn't think about what we had to do, we both just pitched in and did it!  We had no other choice.  We did call hospice, which has been offering mild help until he needed further assistance.  Yesterday was the day.  They came and told us to call an ambulance.  And since Uncle didn't want to ride in the ambulance alone and Aunt drove and Uncle wanted me to ride with him and hold his hand.  I did so and it wasn't a pleasant experience other than knowing that he wasn't alone with strangers.

Upon arrival at the hospital and getting into an ER room, I had no idea that hospice patients with DNR and no life support orders and their families are basically left to deal with the situation in the ER room alone until it becomes necessary for the patients comfort  while the final days of their lives pass.  Uncle has an open stoma in his throat, and the cancer is continuing to grow.  He takes nothing by mouth and the only air he gets is through this stoma.  Needless to say that while coughing and breathing out, any secretions will be spewed out this stoma.  When it became noticeable that he was having trouble breathing they called in the respirator team and they discovered that he had a large blood  clot that he was unable to cough out.  The man was literally dieing from strangulation.  To watch someone struggle just to breath is one of the scariest situations I have run into. They did suction it out for him and placed a special stoma respirator over the stoma to help him.  They were very helpful with keeping him comfortable after that with pain meds but the total care of any secretions being expelled were left to Aunt and I.  They decided since they could not get a bed that day for him at the VA Hospital, they would move him to the Cancer Center there.  He did get much better care there. 

Today he is awaiting transfer to the VA Hospital and will be on palliative care and hospice until the end comes.  I can tell you, it was quite an experience and one I hope to never have to go through again.  At this time, I would like to tell every nurse and care taker out there how much more respect and admiration I have for them and what they are required to do!  I could never do this kind of thing on a regular basis.  By the time I got home last night at about 6:30PM, I couldn't wait to jump in the shower and get some clean cloths on.  And about 4 hours after being home and cleaned up, I fell apart!

God Bless all the Palliative Care and Hospice Workers!!!!!

Wednesday, May 19, 2010

Hump Day.............

and I just found out, almost a week after receiving it, that I was the recipient of an award given to me by my good friend and adopted daughter.  Thanks Clew!  I do feel special and now that I have it, I almost feel guilty for not posting as much as I use to..........but not quite guilty enough!  However according to Clew, I am supposed to choose ten people to give this award to.  Although there are many blogger friends who deserve this award and it will be tough to choose, I wish I could give it to all of you.  First there is Jaynewan who writes some wonderful things about what she sees and where she lives.  And I can't forget my good friend Mary Anne, who lives on an island with the most beautiful scenery for miles around and is a very intelligent and interesting writer, and who happens to be an RN.  She is a fabulous writer and person!  Another one is Rebecca, who has some very interesting things that she writes about too.  And since I haven't been keeping up on my blogging or reading, I am at a loss as to whom else to chose.  Some of the ones I would have chosen were already picked by Clew, so until I can think of others, this will have to do for now!  And once again, thanks Clewy for the award you bestowed upon me!

Tuesday, April 20, 2010

Stupid commercials!

I don't usually rant and rave about something I've seen on television, but this has really ticked me off.

There is a commercial out for a 'no touch' soap dispenser. It advertises that the other soap dispensers are covered with germs when you touch the top to dispense the soap. Do these people really think we are all idiots? That we can't figure out that if you pick up germs from the touchable soap dispenser to get soap in your hand to wash, that the antibacterial soap you have in your hand will not destroy the germs you may have picked up from the top of the soap dispenser.

I mean, really, the tactics manufacturers will stoop too in order to get the public to purchase their products. And what an insult to our intelligence!

I guess it's really trivial in comparison to the over all conditions we all face in this world............but this one just pushed me over the top!

Good Night!

Wednesday, April 14, 2010

No storms today!

Well, even though thunderstorms were predicted for today, they never showed up. And now I am glad I didn't mention it to the girls (our dogs) or they would have been restless and worried for no reason. In fact it ended up being quite a nice day! Sunshine and highs in the high 50's.

I made dinner for our oldest daughter and her family. They moved into their new home recently and are still trying to get settled in. They are living in the basement while they finish the upstairs which will eventually be the main living quarters and main floor. But it is quite cozy the way they have it set up in the walkout basement. Anyway, I thought it would be easier for them if they didn't have to stop and take time away from unpacking to cook. I took them lemon pepper chicken, mashed potatoes and broccoli. Forgot the cream.....left it home in the freezer but that's okay, you can bet that I'll eat it!

My daughter-in-law took their dinner over to them the other night..........she took chicken spaghetti and garlic bread and a homemade peanut butter pie which is to die for. It was so nice of her to do that........but she is a great gal and comes from a great family........our lives have been enriched since she joined our family!

Well, it's getting late, and I need to work tomorrow, so this is abiento.............goodbye in French!

Tuesday, April 06, 2010


We had a couple of big storms roll through here late last night and ealry this morning. Lots of thunder, lightening and high winds!

I happen to live with two dogs who don't like storms. One is absolutely terrified and is very hard to console and the other one just seems to need to be close by. Well, in all reality they both need to be close by. Either on the bed or right next to where I am, sitting or sleeping, and have my hand touching them. A foot is just not good enough! So if the power goes out and your are trying to read a book with a flashlight as long as the 'girls' won't let you sleep anyway, it is near impossible unless you are very adept at holding the flashlight in your mouth and turning pages with your feet if you are lucky enough to be able to get them that high!

They (the meteoroligistsa) are predicting more thunderstorms for tonight). I can only hope that they are terribly wrong with their predictions!!!

Friday, April 02, 2010

I did it and I'm not sorry!

Okay, I gave my 2 week notice yesterday and my last day of work will be April 15th. And since I only work part-time anyway (Wed., Thurs, and Fri) I only have 6 days left to work. Normally it would be five, but I am commited to filling in for the girl I job share with on April 12th while she goes to a doctor appointment. But The 12th is only a 3 hour day, where Wed. and Thurs. still are whole days. It is what it is.............and that's that!

Tuesday, March 30, 2010

Job hours cut!

Well, my hours at work have been cut again. Last time I had to take a cut in pay and hours. This time they just want a cut in hours. That would give me only 9 hours a week to work. I'm thinking it really isn't worth my time to go in for 3 hours, 3 days a week! It will cut my pay in half too. It takes effect April 19Th. I have upcoming doctor visits and decisions to be made concerning my health, so I'm thinking it's best just to give my notice and that would give me just 8 more days to work. But with Tom laid off, is it the smartest decision to make. The amount of pay I would make would make in two weeks would probably buy groceries for a week, but with the price of gas rising all the time, I'm wondering if I can justify continuing to work! I receive no benefits from working part-time and don't receive any holiday pay. They would still want me to drive to corporate headquarters a couple times a year to fill in full-time for the front desk gal who would be going on vacations, but even that doesn't amount to that much and corporate headquarters is another 20 miles of driving every day added to what I now drive.

So, I am just venting and putting it down in writing to better help me think it through and come up with a solution that is best for me at this time.

Saturday, January 09, 2010

9 days into the New Year............

and it is my oldest grandsons birthday. He is 21 today..........the official entry into adulthood! But he's been an adult since he was 18 at least and perhaps even before that. Always a responsible young man with wisdom beyond his years in age.....always kind, considerate and polite. I've never heard him speak rudely to anyone, not even his siblings. His sister Em will be 18 in April and his little brother, Drew was just 5 the end of October, 2009. Steve has always been one of Drew's biggest fans and vice versa. They absolutely adore one shows on both their faces when Steve walks in the door coming home from college for a visit! A rare thing in today's world of older siblings being too busy to have time for younger ones.........especially with the age difference between these two! It is amazing and awesome just to watch them interact together. Yet they are a very close knit family and I guess I should give credit where credit is due. My daughter (who is 41 now and I'm still pondering how she got that old) has been such a great influence on all her kids. If there were such a thing as a 'Wonder Mom' she would have that title. She was always patient and kind and listened to their explanation before doling out any kind of punishment.............she didn't learn that from me! I can really say that I admire and respect her.............she deserves both, if not more!

So this is a Happy Birthday to Steve, our first born grand child, and to my daughter, for without her, Steve wouldn't be here or who he is.

How did I get so blessed!